She Met Him On-line And Thinks He Is Gay. How Can You Tell? Ask Dr. Karen!


When You Need Some Advice Don’t Ask Twice… Ask Dr. Karen!
Dear Dr. Karen:
I’m a 20 year old young lady who met a guy online. I live in Chicago and he lives in Canada. We have been communicating for a couple of months. I realize there is some distance between us. He seems to be a nice guy and I like him a lot, but some things just don’t add up.
During our conversations he always mentions all of his guys and how they hang out at different clubs several times a week. He talks about how much fun they have, how close they are and how good looking they are. He said they drink a lot and usually wind up crashing at his house at the end of the night. This seems to be the topic of most of his conversations.
Since we have been online for several months I thought we could move forward. I asked him about exchanging numbers or even communicating face time. His response was that he didn’t feel comfortable enough yet to do that. I even mentioned that maybe sometime I could come to Canada to visit. He didn’t think that was a good idea. Do you think it is time to let go?
                                                                         ~   Something To Hide
Dear Something To Hide:
You’re right. Things do add up. They add  up to zero. The writing is on the wall in big neon letters. He mentioned hanging out frequently at the clubs. It just might be the boys club. If they are having pajama parties at the end of the night, he may be more into guys instead of you. It’s possible that he is just seeking a female friend.
You said some things just don’t add up. This is when your common sense should kick in and you listen to your gut feelings. This is going nowhere end it now.
How many readers have dated online and what was your experience? I would love to hear about it.
 ***Dr. Karen R. January is an expert in youth development as well as male-female relationships.  Her new book, ¨Lessons Mama Never Taught Me,¨ profiles 10 women and the mistakes they made in parenting, love and life.  It can be purchased at  Please send your questions to Dr. Karen at

Visit her website:  FB: drkayj  Twitter: @drkjanuary
***Disclaimer “The advice offered in this column is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. Dr. Karen January, the newspaper and publisher are not responsible for the outcome or results of following any advice in any given situation. You, and only you, are completely responsible for your actions.” Due to the large number of letters received, there is no guarantee that your question will be published.


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