Dear Chat Daddy,
I’m a 19-year-old girl who just joined a popular sorority on my college campus. I love my sorors and we do everything together. One problem though. All of them are GORGEOUS. I’m definitely not a jealous girl at all and I wouldn’t say t
However, I feel that I have to compete with them for attention at times. They all have “good hair” (naturally or purchased), expensive clothes, and a knack for attracting cute boys. Sometimes I feel like I’m not being myself for the sake of just wanting to be with the “in” crowd. I’m scared that if I am myself, they won’t accept me and guys won’t pay me any attention. How do I maintain a balance of being myself but still fit into my sorority?
-Just Trying To Fit In Where I Can
Dear Just Trying To Fit In Where I Can,
At this point in your life, I’m encouraging you to focus on your educational endeavors. The most important part about becoming a complete person is accepting yourself for who you are, not accepting the person you think other people want you to be. It’s a wonderful thing when you join a brother- or sisterhood; it tends to give you a sense of belonging.
However, I ask you, if you do not belong to yourself, how can you be your best in service to others? We are often faced with dealing with superficial people. As you continue on your journey, always use your best intuition and judgment towards creating a life that’s built on self-appreciation. Keep your spirit clean, and as you grow into the person and purpose that is divinely yours, you will attract the people and situations that are meant for you. Be encouraged.
Dear Chat Daddy,
I am a 33-year-old female whose boyfriend of eight years and father of our two children has all of a sudden turned to Christ. He recently quit his job so he could spend his entire day proselytizing on the streets. He has cut off all sexual contact with me since his sudden Christian conversion. I’ve addressed my issues with him about us not having sex and he says he is now celibate. Chat Daddy, this comment comes from a man who wanted sex all day, everyday before he had his revelation. Is it me or what, because I’m now thinking about cheating on him. Please advise.
-Trying Not To Pass Judgment
Dear Trying Not To Pass Judgment,
I appreciate your letter, but who am I to question another man in the discovery of his faith. You going out cheating on him is not wise because this will do nothing but complete your division. Quitting his job does sound a bit strange. Your boyfriend may have come to a point in his life where he needs to realign himself in order to understand exactly where he stands in his spiritual life. This is natural. Most humans tend to face this at some point or another. Ask yourself, “Will this change make him a better family man?” Why don’t you and your boyfriend sit down alone and discuss his reasoning behind his sudden religious awakening. Perhaps his answers will give you the clarity you so desperately need. Don’t give up on him, but try working with him on his journey to become a complete and whole man. Always remember that the universe is about change all the time.
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