Dear Chat Daddy, My 89-year-old grandmother is terminally ill and suffers from severe Alzheimer’s disease. She is accusing her recent home care worker, a woman our family has known for over 20 years, of stealing over $2,000 worth of jewelry from her dress
My grandmother has told us that she does not want the worker around to take care of her anymore and that we need to hire someone else who is trustworthy and qualified enough to do the job. We are not sure of what we should do because of course we are in deep shock. Should we confront her caregiver or simply just chalk it up to grandma being old and suffering this acute loss of memory? Please advise. -Lost And Uncertain
Dear Lost And Uncertain, I’m very sorry to hear of your grandmother’s condition. It is definitely hard to deal with a loved one’s illness and finding the proper caregiver to assist in his or her every need. In regards to her accusing her caregiver of stealing, I would suggest that you do a thorough search of her dresser before doing any type of confrontation. If you are not successful in your search, I suggest that you bring it up to her without being accusatory. I am not a doctor, however, it very well may be a case of your grandmother’s memory failing and the severity of her illness weakening her sense of security and logic. If you and your family have known the lady for a number of years now, I assume that you trust her being with and caring for your grandmother. You and your family have a heart-to-heart discussion about this and somehow come to a harmonious medium. This is not to say that you should dismiss your grandmother’s wishes, but try to sort things out before jumping to any kind of conclusions. Be encouraged.
Dear Chat Daddy,
I am a 37-year-old single mother of a 13-year-old son. I suspect he is having sex. Recently, while doing some housework in the living room, I accidentally knocked his notebook off of the cocktail table and inside was a pornographic magazine. Alarmed, I then went up to his room and began looking through his drawers and found two boxes of condoms%uFFFDand three of them were missing. My gut feeling tells me that he is experimenting with sex and it frightens me. How do I cope with this? Please advise.
-Mommy’s Little Boy Is Becoming A Man Dear Mommy’s Little Boy Is Becoming A Man, Thank you for your letter. I would suggest that, without confronting him in a negative and harsh way, you have a formal conversation and ask him whether or not he is engaging in sexual activity. Teenagers today are experimenting with a lot of things and just because you found a pornographic magazine in his book, don’t necessarily mean that he is having sex. However, the missing condoms do ring a bell. Talk to him and allow him to be honest with you. Reassure him that you are not there to judge and ridicule him, but that you only want him to be straight up with you. If he is having sex, explain the pros and cons: peer pressure, pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and, of course, HIV/AIDS. The silver lining is that at least he is protecting himself with condom usage, although nothing is 100 percent safe and effective. Here’s to you and your son developing a closer relationship by keeping the doors of communication open with honesty, sincerity and unconditional. Be encouraged.
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