I have been dating a particular young lady for three years. During that time I fell in love with her. For the past two years, I have been helping her pay her mortgage and her car note. Last year she admitted she “cheated” on m
Dear Gwendolyn: I have been dating a particular young lady for three years. During that time I fell in love with her. For the past two years, I have been helping her pay her mortgage and her car note. Last year she admitted she “cheated” on me with another man for about six months. She told me it was a mistake and she said she thought I was cheating on her (I wasn’t). She said that after church when I would fill up her car tank, she would go visit the other man. This year we renewed our commitment. However, she recently told me that she was diagnosed with Chlamydia. She first tried to blame me for the infection. However, that would be highly unlikely due to the fact she is the only woman I have been intimate with over the past three years. I have Type II diabetes which makes healing from infections a slow painful process. I got tested and fortunately I do not have the disease. When I asked her why she would cheat, she said that the money I gave her was a gift and she could do whatever she wished to do with it. She admitted using the money to spend on the other man. Gwendolyn, I really believe she loves me. I am at wit’s end. I love her. Now to the silly question, “What should I do?” -Jim
Dear Jim: Your question is not silly. You just happen to be in love. But what is silly is the fact after all her mistreatment to you, something in your head makes you feel she loves you. Let me tell you this: Unfortunately, you met a woman who characterized you as being a fool. There is a more serious matter than money. That issue being your health. Send this woman out of your life immediately. Next time Jim, it could be AIDS. Sure, you are going to hurt because love is painful, but as Jean de La Fontaine explains it, “Sadness flies away on the wings of time.” With the present state of the economy, this woman is going to miss your money and call you. Think about it. Be strong Jim. Don’t give her a dollar–not even a dime.
Write to Gwendolyn Baines at P. O. Box 10066, Raleigh, N.C. 27605-0066, e-mail her at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit her Web site at: www.gwenbaines.com.
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