When You Need Some Advice Don’t Ask Twice… Ask Dr. Karen!

***To all my on-line readers, I would like to thank each and everyone of you for your continued support and your comments. They are appreciated and valued.

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Dear Dr. Karen

 

I am in a two-year relationship with a very special man. We moved in together this April and we continue to grow as individuals and as a couple. Currently, we are having some difficulties because he recently lost his job. He is having a problem in finding another one due to the economy.

I’ve noticed lately that he has become moody and distant. We have always had a very sexual and affectionate relationship, and though he still cuddles and kisses me, there has been very little sex from him.

Recently, I caught him watching adult movies without me and I feel neglected. He says he finds me attractive, but he chooses to be alone with his porn. I think you know what that means.

I expressed my worries to him very openly, and he simply said he does not watch adult movies as often as I think. I turn to you for advice because I feel sexually abandoned. I know he is not in a good space right now to hear my feelings because he is trying to deal with his own.

                                                                     Sexually Starved

Dear Sexually Starved:

Your boyfriend feels the sexual tension all men feel and the need for release. When he was bringing home a paycheck, he was a confident and secure man. Now, that he doesn’t have a paycheck, he is turning to himself instead. Don’t focus on or intensify the symptoms caused by his unemployment. He is not rejecting you sexually. He just feels unworthy as a bread winner to approach.

Now is the time to support him in every way and stop focusing on yourself. He may need more training to get another job, or he may need to start over again at a lower level none of which is easy. Trying to micromanage his biology won’t help either of you. Helping him to get back on his feet, will put you back in the sack!

***How do you feel about your significant other watching adult movies?

***Dr. Karen R. January is an expert in youth development as well as male-female relationships.  Her book, ¨Lessons Mama Never Taught Me,¨ profiles 10 women and the mistakes they made in parenting, love and life.  It can be purchased at Amazon.com.  Please send your questions to Dr. Karen at askdrjanuary@gmail.com.

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Disclaimer “The advice offered in this column is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. Dr. Karen January, the newspaper and publisher are not responsible for the outcome or results of following any advice in any given situation. You, and only you, are completely responsible for your actions.” Due to the large number of letters received there is no guarantee that your question will be published.

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