When You Need Some Advice Don’t Ask Twice… Ask Dr. Karen!
***To all my on-line readers, I would like to thank each and everyone of you for your continued support and your comments. They are appreciated and valued.
Dear Dr. Karen:
I have been obsessed with a male teacher of mine for months. I am a 16-year old girl. He is in his late 30’s and married with young children.
We have a nice rapport and are friends in a very appropriate sense. He is proper and respectful to me, as a teacher should be. However, I still have a huge crush on him.
I think about him constantly, and every time we exchange a few words, my heart races and I want to kiss him. I know we can’t be more than friends. Should I discuss my feelings with him? I want to talk to him about it. What should I do?
A crush is not a “we thing,” it’s a “me thing.” It is something you experience and eventually, it will pass. You stated that you know it is impossible to be more than friends. So, what is it that you need to talk to him about? It is obvious that you still have a fantasy about making something happen between you two.
Do you realize that you could jeopardize this man’s marriage, family life, his career and place in the community? Just like you said, you are a 16-year old girl, not a woman. Wake up sleeping beauty! This is not a fairy tale. You are entertaining dangerous thoughts that can get you in trouble. You are playing with fire. When you play with fire you can get burned.
Final Thoughts: I think we all (men and women) have had a crush on one of our teachers. How did you handle it?
***Dr. Karen R. January is an expert in youth development as well as male-female relationships. Her new book, ¨Lessons Mama Never Taught Me,¨ profiles 10 women and the mistakes they made in parenting, love and life. It can be purchased at Amazon.com. Please send your questions to Dr. Karen at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Visit her website: www.drkaykay.com
Disclaimer “The advice offered in this column is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional, financial, medical, legal, or other professional advice. Dr. Karen January, the newspaper and publisher are not responsible for the outcome or results of following any advice in any given situation. You, and only you, are completely responsible for your actions.” Due to the large number of letters received there is no guarantee that your question will be published.