“Some days, you don’t want to move. You’re in the darkness and as much as it hurts, you say to yourself, I’m going to sit right here. Why, because this is what I deserve because I am that horrible of a person.”
– Wayne Brady, 2014
Multi-talented actor, host and comedian Wayne Brady has made audiences laugh for years on shows like “Whose Line Is It Anyway,” “Let’s Make A Deal” and Dave Chappelle’s “Chapelle’s Show”. But sadly, he’s been dealing with a lot of pain behind the scenes.
Brady began to spiral down, so much so that it ended his marriage in 2006. But the turning point for him was his 42nd birthday in 2013. That’s when he hit rock bottom emotionally. Holding nothing back the comedian gave a very stark description about his low point on Entertainment Tonight.
“I was there by myself, in my bedroom and I had a complete breakdown,” said Brady. “Just go ahead and imagine for yourself a brother in his underwear, in his room, you got snot…and that birthday was the beginning of, ‘OK, I’ve got to make a change.’”
He was careful to point out that this was simply the moment he knew that he couldn’t allow himself to continue to wallow. The comedian explained that depression is a vicious cycle, where you tell yourself a lot of bad lies about yourself and you feel down. A depressed person continually internalizes the negative thoughts until they eventually becomes true to you, and you no longer see the value in your own life.
Having a breakdown on his birthday was just the starting point for his journey to healing. It still wasn’t an immediate change for Brady.
“It took me a while to get my stuff together to go, ‘You know what? If you’re not happy, you have to do something about it,’” he said . “Just to admit that you are feeling this way is a huge step. To claim that, to say, ‘Why do I feel dark? Why do I feel unhappy? Let me do something about this.’”
Below is a video of the interview: